I am sitting in my 6 x 12 tile room in NYC. The warm air from both a window and square plastic box fan is blowing on me from both sides. This tiny room with a single bed, closet, small desk & dresser represent an important part of my journey, not always comfortable, but necessary. This is where I lived while studying for the USLME Step 1 exam.
Any medical student aiming to practice in the USA will tell you that Step 1 is the most important exam of their life; everyone has a story of the stress they endured to study for this exam, which ultimately culminates in a three digit score that will largely determine one's fate as a doctor.
Any medical student aiming to practice in the USA will tell you that Step 1 is the most important exam of their life; everyone has a story of the stress they endured to study for this exam, which ultimately culminates in a three digit score that will largely determine one's fate as a doctor.
The stakes were no different for me as I finally sat for this exam on May 17, 2013 at the Westbury Prometric center on Long Island (where I grew up), after canceling it twice. What WAS different is that I am 43 years old & never prepared for a standardized exam (besides my social work licensing test). As you get to know me you will come to understand why I never took the SAT, GRE (took it but did not study) or MCAT exam. For now, I will just say that victory over Step 1 (praise God) & my passion to make a difference in the world of medicine prompted me on this sweaty, Saturday morning to continue the blog I started right before my 40th birthday.
I came back to New York from the small island of Sint Eustatius ("Statia") in the Dutch Caribbean in March 2012. I never got to walk in my basic science graduation because I had to leave early to secure this room.
My plans were to take a Kaplan course in July after reviewing all of the videos & my Step 1 exam shortly after. My NBME practice scores, however, told me something very different; I had a long way to go. My first practice test score after Kaplan was a measly 163, only 3 points higher than than my first comprehensive basic science NBME during medical school. A low NBME score with almost every arrow pointing in the wrong direction was discouraging but I had to remember how far I had come already.
My plans were to take a Kaplan course in July after reviewing all of the videos & my Step 1 exam shortly after. My NBME practice scores, however, told me something very different; I had a long way to go. My first practice test score after Kaplan was a measly 163, only 3 points higher than than my first comprehensive basic science NBME during medical school. A low NBME score with almost every arrow pointing in the wrong direction was discouraging but I had to remember how far I had come already.
At age 35, with zero science background, I was accepted into a post-baccalaureate premedical studies program at the City College of New York. At that time, I was a social worker directing the Baby Steps Home Visiting Program in Harlem and living in my first "real" home, a one BR prewar coop I bought in the Riverdale section of the Bronx.
A lot of medical students know early on that they want to become a doctor; I didn’t figure that out until I was 35. As a kid who spent a lot of time sick in hospitals, I did want to be a nurse early on though made little advancements toward that goal. When I finally got to college and looked at the career books, I narrowed down my choices to Speech Pathologist, Nurse or Social Worker. I wanted to help people, like my guidance counselor helped me get accepted to college even though I was a terrible, mostly absent student. I looked at the science requirements for both nursing & speech pathology and said, “I can’t do that.” Social work it was.
As the director of Baby Steps and a community faculty member for Harlem Hospital’s community pediatric residency program, I meet weekly with mostly IMG residents who rotated through our program & conducted home visits to Baby Steps families. The linkage we built between the hospital and the community inspired me to pursue medicine as a 2nd career. I started at the beginning with basic math and took 1-2 courses a semester until I completed all of my premed requirements. I even signed up for tutoring for the first couple of courses, which helped me gain a lot of confidence since studying science was all new to me. There are lots of little (and very big) stories that occurred during this time, which I will get to in future posts!
Back to NYC, post Kaplan, 2012... armed with my new Hunter College Alumni card (I received my MSW from Hunter College in 1994), I trucked with my new, big bag (a graduation gift from my brother Billy) through 3 subways each way every day to reach the Hunter College main library on Lexington Ave. and 68th Street. In my bag were the usual suspects: my dependable MacBook Pro, my falling apart 2011 First Aid which I eventually replaced by the color 2013 FA, Pathoma & my embarrassingly barely read BRS physio book (my very worst friend which I was trying to make amends with), external hard drive, head set, glasses (I never needed glasses until I got back from medical school) plus some fruit, water & 1-2 peanut butter & jelly sandwiches.
Hunter College has a huge 7-floor library, which was undergoing renovation during my study time. You have to take the 7th floor elevator to the 3rd floor and transfer to another elevator to reach the very bottom quiet floor, which is where I lived eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches & drinking Vitamin water (I joked that this was my health plan) + Pathoma + FA for almost a year. During this time, I was also completing coursework and an internship for an online Master’s in Public Health (MPH) and doing intermittent consultant work at a hospital in the Bronx.
About three months ago, a fellow US medical student asked me how it was that I started medical school at age 40. When I gave him a short, highly edited version of my journey, from wayward- barely-graduated-from-HS-youth to social worker to MD student, he simply said, "You are unorthodox." I smiled and thought, "If he only knew."
About three months ago, a fellow US medical student asked me how it was that I started medical school at age 40. When I gave him a short, highly edited version of my journey, from wayward- barely-graduated-from-HS-youth to social worker to MD student, he simply said, "You are unorthodox." I smiled and thought, "If he only knew."
No comments:
Post a Comment